Self-Compassion in the New Year
For most people, the New Year also means making a new list of resolutions and goals. However, these resolutions often come with the pressure to follow through with every single goal without making room for our humanity, for our need for rest, for the natural and normal need for shifting and changing given life’s challenges and demands. By missing just one day of our new routine, it’s easy to fall into feelings of shame and defeat, giving up on the goals we set altogether.
In fact, the third Monday of January is referred to as “Blue Monday” because this day is often the day when many people have already decided to give up on their resolutions or goals that they set at the beginning of the year.
One of the biggest reasons why New Year's resolutions fail is because we set unrealistic expectations for ourselves and then beat ourselves up when we inevitably fall short. However, when we are hardest on ourselves is when we need to practice self-compassion the most.
Self-compassion is a powerful tool that helps us combat feelings of shame and guilt, and it can actually help us achieve our New Year's resolutions in the long run. Self compassion is the act of treating ourselves with kindness, understanding, and forgiveness, just as we would treat a good friend.
Self-compassion helps us befriend the negative, critical voice in our head by allowing us to acknowledge our challenges and setbacks without judgment and to use them as opportunities for growth and learning.
Learn more about cultivating a practice of self-compassion by checking out the resources below:
Instagram accounts
Books + Articles
Five Myths of Self-Compassion by Dr. Kristin Neff
The Extraordinary Gift of Being Ordinary: Finding Happiness Right Where You Are by Ronald D. Siegel
The Mindful Path to Self-Compassion: Freeing Yourself from Destructive Thoughts and Emotions by Christopher K. Germer
As we set our goals for the New Year and as we are tempted to abandon them altogether due to life’s challenges and changes, let's also make a resolution to practice and cultivate self-compassion, trusting that when we do, we’ll find more space for living the life we want.
